I may be trapped. I may be completely unable to move independently. I am, however, keenly aware of the passage of time. On paper, on my son's grades in the online format, on my face, proof of time's uncaring and inevitable passage is everywhere on everything and everyone. My maternal grandmother died at my age and she was a nurse. My parents are still alive and well, thank God. I am thankful because I come from a long line of people who died young.
I used to measure time as something to be endured. At the hospital, especially, then at home, counting the hours until a medical professional refreshed my IV (at the hospital) or when it was time for pills (at home). That was over a year ago now I do that at the gym. 60 minutes on the bike, 50 minutes on the bench, :watching my life go by. Knowing with every passing hour that no matter what I do those hours roll into another day I've lost forever. Not knowing when or where the next challenge will present itself, keeps me on my toes and on my guard.
"Get busy living or get busy dying!", I think Morgan Freeman said that, in a movie. I have to get better, fast. So I can get on with the business of living, and yes, The Holidays are going to bite. Hard.
I used to measure time as something to be endured. At the hospital, especially, then at home, counting the hours until a medical professional refreshed my IV (at the hospital) or when it was time for pills (at home). That was over a year ago now I do that at the gym. 60 minutes on the bike, 50 minutes on the bench, :watching my life go by. Knowing with every passing hour that no matter what I do those hours roll into another day I've lost forever. Not knowing when or where the next challenge will present itself, keeps me on my toes and on my guard.
"Get busy living or get busy dying!", I think Morgan Freeman said that, in a movie. I have to get better, fast. So I can get on with the business of living, and yes, The Holidays are going to bite. Hard.
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