Hello Fellow Travelers!
Case in point: Yesterday, I was alone and there was a knock. It's usually a delivery of some kind and I never open the front door - but eventually I peeked and saw a delivery had indeed been left in my doorway, but it wasn't some bubblewrapped whatever from Amazon. It was a crate of very perishable grocery items, eggs and meats and a wrapped case of forty 16oz water bottles. My task was to get the perishables into the refrigerator ASAP!
I cleared a path to the kitchen, cleared space in the freezer and dragged the water and the grocery crate indoors. It was a Herculean effort! I was fierce! I was unstoppable, single-minded in my purpose! GI Jane? Try GI Jan! Then my PS arrived. Apparently I had inadvertently received an order from Sam's Club (Walmart) and didn't realize it until I saw a chuck roast. I know how to break down a steer, but I can't say where a "chuck" is. There were other clues that this "mysterioso" gift was a little more Grub than Hub: The strawberry-lemonade that I thought was soooo thoughtful was in fact, on closer inspection, a cheap, syrupy knockoff of Tropicana Lemonade. Another sign? Nobody we know eats Velveeta -n- Shells.
So after tolerating a flood (and still trickling in) of Redneck jokes from my child and the PS, I made pearls out of chum and donated everything to a foodbank. The hungry get the food the people who ordered the food get refunded and we are able to feed a few people. And I won't have to eat anything with a face. Everybody wins!
No comments:
Post a Comment